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三月里劉熏宇君來(lái)信,說(shuō)互生病了,而且是沒(méi)有希望的病,醫(yī)生說(shuō)只好等日子了。四月底在《時(shí)事新報(bào)》上見(jiàn)到立達(dá)學(xué)會(huì)的通告,想不到這么快互生就歿了!后來(lái)聽(tīng)說(shuō)他病中的光景,那實(shí)在太慘;為他想,早點(diǎn)去,少吃些苦頭,也未嘗不好的。但丟下立達(dá)這個(gè)學(xué)校,這班朋友,這班學(xué)生,他一定不甘心,不瞑目!
互生最叫我們紀(jì)念的是他做人的態(tài)度。他本來(lái)是一副銅筋鐵骨,黑皮膚襯著那一套大布之衣,看去像個(gè)鄉(xiāng)下人。他什么苦都吃得,從不曉得享用,也像鄉(xiāng)下人。他心里那一團(tuán)火,也像鄉(xiāng)下人。那一團(tuán)火是熱,是力,是光。由他不愛(ài)多說(shuō)話,但常常微笑;那微笑是自然的,溫暖的。在他看,人是可以互相愛(ài)著的,除了一些成見(jiàn)已深,不愿打開(kāi)窗戶說(shuō)亮話。的。他對(duì)這些人卻有些憎惡,不肯假借一點(diǎn)顏色。世界上只有能憎的人才能愛(ài);愛(ài)憎沒(méi)有定見(jiàn),只是毫無(wú)作為的腳色。公互生覺(jué)得青年成見(jiàn)還少,希望最多;所以愿意將自己的生命一滴不剩而獻(xiàn)給他們,讓愛(ài)的宗教在他們中間發(fā)榮滋長(zhǎng),讓他們都走向新世界去。互生不好發(fā)議論,只埋著頭干干干,是儒家的真正精神。我和他并沒(méi)有深談過(guò),但從他的行事看來(lái),相信我是認(rèn)識(shí)他的。
n March I heard from Mr. Liu Xunyu that Husheng was sick and hopelessly sick at that. The doctor said there was nothing he could do but to trait for the day to arrive. Toward the end of April, I came across an obituary issued by Lida Association in the newspaper Current Affairs. How quickly the day had arrived! Later, when I learned how he had suffered during his illness, I thought it was too miserable. From his point of view, however, his passing away was not a bad thing after all, because he suffered less by going earlier. But it must have been very hard for him to close his eyes and resign himself to the fact that he was leaving his Lida School, his friends and his students behind.
What wag most memorable about Husheng was his attitude toward life. He was as strong as a man of steel, his dark complexion set off by clothes of coarse cloth, looking like someone from the countryside. He could withstand any hardship and never sought ease and comfort. In this respect he was like a countryman, too. Again like a countryman, he had a heart as warns as fire radiating warmth, power and light. He was a man of few words, but of all smiles. His smile was natural and friendly. In his view, people could love each other, except those with deep prejudices and those who could not bring themselves out in the open. He hated these people, and to them he wouldn't show anything like gentleness. In this world, only those who could hate could love. Those who did not know what to love and what to hate were useless people. Hussheng thought that young people had little prejudice but lots of future promise, so he was willing to devote his life to them without reservation, letting the religion of love grow and flourish among them so that they could all go to a new world. Husheng was not fond of talking too much, instead, he put his mind on work, and work, and nothing but work--an embodiment of the Confucian spirit. Though I never had a chance to talk with him very closely, I was convinced that I understood him from the way he carried himself and conducted matters.
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