What's your lame superpower?

你有沒有一種毫無用處的超能力?

I have an insane sense of smell. Like a basset hound. I’m like a 5ft basset hound.

我對氣味有一種瘋狂的感知能力。就像一只短腿獵犬，我就像一個5英尺高的短腿獵犬。

- I can walk into a room blindfolded and tell you who is there, by scent.

- 我可以被蒙住眼睛走進一個房間，并通過香味告訴你誰在那里。

- Wet dogs, body odor, perfume, cigarettes, and diapers actually make me vomit. I can't ride on public transportation without an emergency bag.

- 濕狗、體味、香水、香煙和尿布真的能讓我吐出來。我不能不帶嘔吐袋就去乘坐公共交通。

- I can tell when my husband has opened whisky bottle from 2 floors and 5 rooms away.

- 我能從2層樓和5個房間之外就聞出我老公打開了一瓶威士忌。

- I can smell farts a few minutes before anyone else can. And if you burp in my face, I will slap you.

- 如果一個屁已經(jīng)消散了，別人都聞不到，但我還能聞幾分鐘。如果你在我的臉上打嗝，我會抽你。

I can prevent people from getting bitten by mosquitoes by just being present within a 5 metre radius of them.

我可以防止人們被蚊子叮咬，只要在他們的5米半徑內(nèi)。

This is simply because all the mosquitoes bite me instead. I am a super mosquito attractor. I am bitten by mosquitoes that appear out of nowhere when I am around.

這只是因為所有的蚊子都咬了我。我是一個超 級吸蚊機。任何看不見蚊子的地方，只要我去，就能被咬。

I have a really lame superpower. I can remember Phone numbers really well. I had a habit of never storing anyone's number with their name. Everyday I used to just go through the contacts book and play this game of remembering the numbers.

我有一個真的很沒用的超能力。我記得電話號碼真的記得很好。我有一個習慣，從來不建通訊錄。我以前每天就這么看聯(lián)系人列表，然后想這些號碼是誰想著玩。

I can take any photograph and create an exact replica of it on a sheet of paper, using just pencils.

我可以隨便拍一張照片，并在紙上畫出一個精確的副本，只用鉛筆。

Why spend 6 bloody hours drawing while I can just convert the original photo into monochrome using any photo editing tool you ask?

但是，既然能通過照片編輯軟件把任何照片轉換成單色，那為什么要TM花6個的小時畫畫呢?

Because I can.

因為我行我樂意。

Mirror Writing

鏡像書寫

Yes, that's my lame superpower.

是的，這是我的超能力。

I can write like that, effortlessly from right to left. I don't have to imagine the orientation of any of the letters, it's like its been fed into my brain cells.

我可以這樣寫，毫不費力地從右到左寫。我不必想象任何字母的方向，它們就好像被送入了我的腦細胞一樣。

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