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When I was 6 years old, my parents got me a usedbicycle for Christmas.
A year or so later, I badly wanted a Sting-Ray, atricked-out bike that was wildly popular in the1960s. So my father took my old bike, slapped anew coat of paint on it, and equipped it with abanana seat, monkey handlebars and a sissy bar.
It didn't matter to me that some friends had newSting-Rays straight from the Schwinn factory. Oreven that my dad put the sissy bar on backward,which exposed me to some teasing before we fixedit. I loved that bike.
So it was for my childhood. We weren't poor. But we always had modest Christmases. AndI expected to do the same when I got married 27 years ago.
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My wife, Clarissa, had different ideas. She, too, had some modest Christmases growing up.She vividly remembers when she was 14 or 15 years old and her father lost his job in theconstruction industry. She overheard her parents talking about how broke they were.
So when her parents asked her what she wanted that year, she said, 'Nothing.' When hermother insisted she had to get something, Clarissa asked for socks. 'I felt very good aboutmyself afterward,' she recalls.
But as her family's finances improved, Christmas went back to being a much biggerproduction. By the time I arrived on the scene, the entire family -- more than 20 people --would gather at her grandmother's house in Mexicali, Mexico, on Christmas Eve. Around 10p.m., Santa (my future brother-in-law in a costume) showed up with an enormous bag ofpresents and stepped into a roomful of children shrieking with joy.
'It was all about the children,' says Clarissa, who thought the experience was priceless. Andshe has spent hundreds of dollars on presents every year to duplicate it.
I, in turn, kept trying to relive my childhood. When our oldest son turned 5, I got him aused bike for $35. He seemed happy enough with it.
I've had my victories over the years. Still, Clarissa has generally decided which presents ourthree kids got. And while their take hasn't been outlandish, they have certainly received theirshare of videogames and other yuletide paraphernalia.
It wouldn't be so bad if it was just the five of us. But there are my parents and mybrother's family. And Clarissa comes from a much bigger family, with three siblings, multipleaunts, uncles and cousins, and an ever-expanding population of nieces and nephews. At onepoint, she was buying presents for close to 30 people, plus friends, neighbors, even thegarbage collectors.
That costs money.
One year in the early 1990s, when Clarissa was still working, she recalls spending $2,000 onpresents, the Christmas tree, food for family gatherings and the like. Thankfully, I didn't knowthe extent of it or I would have blown a gasket.
In recent years, as her nephews and nieces have grown up, spending has been morerestrained. A few years ago, the adults in her family switched to a gift-exchange system, inwhich everyone gives a gift to one other person, instead of giving gifts to everyone. That saveda lot of money.
This year, times are tougher. Clarissa's sister works in banking, and one of her brothersdoes construction. Both industries are laying off workers.
So when Clarissa and I talked a few weeks ago about her family's annual gift exchange foradults, we both thought it made sense to restrict gifts to children. She broached the idea withher family, and it fell flat.
'We have to have something to unwrap, even if it's just the ribbon,' one of her aunts toldher.
That was enough for Clarissa. 'If you want to drop out of the gift exchange, go ahead,'Clarissa told me the other day. 'But the rest of us are going ahead.'
Well, I might as well paint a target on myself. Count me in.
我6歲的時候,父母給了我一輛舊單車作為圣誕禮物。
大約一年后,我渴望能有輛Sting-Ray牌單車,在60年代這可是非常時髦的靚車。于是,我父親把我的舊單車拿過去,仿照Sting-Ray的樣子,涂了一層新漆,裝了一個細(xì)長而后部翹起的車座、一個直把,座位后面還裝了一根保護杠。
我并不在乎有些朋友騎的是從Schwinn廠子剛出產(chǎn)的嶄新Sting-Ray單車,也不在乎父親把保護杠裝反了,在重新裝過之前我還受到了一些取笑。我非常喜愛那輛單車。
我童年就是這樣子。我們家并不窮,但我們的圣誕禮物總是很有節(jié)制。27年前我結(jié)婚的時候,我想以后也照此行事。
我妻子克萊瑞薩(Clarissa)卻有著不同的想法。她小時候,有幾年的圣誕節(jié)過得也很節(jié)儉。她仍清晰地記得,在她十四、五歲的時候,從事建筑業(yè)的父親失業(yè)了。她無意中聽到父母談?wù)摷依锷钣卸噢讚?jù)。
所以那年當(dāng)她的父母問她想要什么圣誕禮物時,她回答說,什么也不要。當(dāng)她媽媽堅持讓她選件禮物時,她要了襪子。她回憶道,過后我自我感覺很好。
但是隨著她家經(jīng)濟狀況的好轉(zhuǎn),她又回到了更大的排場。我認(rèn)識她之前,她們一家子(有20多人)會聚在墨西哥墨西卡利市她祖母家里過圣誕夜。晚上10點左右,圣誕老人(我未來的小舅子扮的)會拿著一個裝滿禮物的巨大袋子現(xiàn)身,走進滿屋子快樂尖叫的孩子堆里。
克萊瑞薩說,我們做的一切都是為了孩子。她認(rèn)為這種經(jīng)歷是無價之寶。每年她都要花數(shù)百美元買禮物重溫這種經(jīng)歷。
相反,我則在不斷試圖重溫我的孩提時代。當(dāng)我們的大兒子5歲的時候,我用35美元給他買了一輛二手單車。他看起來對此很知足。
過去幾年中,我也曾占過上風(fēng)。不過,通?巳R瑞薩才是決定給我們?nèi)齻孩子買什么禮物的人。雖然禮物并不奢侈,但是孩子們無疑收到了想要的電子游戲和其他圣誕節(jié)個人用品。
如果只有我們五個的話,情況還不會這么糟。但是還有我的父母和我弟弟的家人。而克萊瑞薩的家族則更加龐大,她有三個兄弟姐妹,很多個叔叔、嬸嬸和表兄弟姐妹,還有一大群不斷壯大的侄女和侄子。曾有一度,她要給將近30個人買禮物,還有朋友、鄰居,甚至垃圾清潔工。
這都要花錢。
克萊瑞薩回憶說,90年代初的某一年她還在工作的時候,她花了2,000美元準(zhǔn)備禮物、 誕樹和食品用于一家團聚和其他活動。謝天謝地,我當(dāng)時并不知道花了這么多錢,否則我早就暴跳如雷了。
這幾年,隨著她的侄子和侄女都陸續(xù)長大了,圣誕支出也得到了控制。幾年前,她家里的成年人轉(zhuǎn)向了“禮物交換”機制──一個人只需要向另外一個人送禮物,而不需要向每個人送禮物。這樣就省了很大一筆錢。
今年,形勢更加嚴(yán)峻。克萊瑞薩的妹妹在銀行業(yè)工作,她的一個弟弟從事建筑業(yè)。這兩個行業(yè)現(xiàn)在都在裁員。
所以,當(dāng)幾周前克萊瑞薩和我討論她們家每年的成年人禮物交換時,我們兩個都覺得有必要限制給孩子的禮物。她和家人說了這個想法,不過沒有得到響應(yīng)。
她的一位嬸嬸對她說,我們必須有個包裝的禮物,即使只是包裝帶也好。
這對克萊瑞薩已經(jīng)足夠了。有一天她對我說,如果你想退出禮物交換,你可以退出;不過我們其余的人還會繼續(xù)下去的。
好吧,這樣我還不如干脆在自己身上畫個靶子。還得算我一個。
資料來源考試網(wǎng)校老師主講教材精講班課程,完整講義下載進入個人中心>>
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